May 2025 Newsletter

This is 1/x monthly or biweekly newsletters that I plan to post here on the blog. This is an alteration of my previous idea to blog daily or bidaily.

Plans are like clouds in the sky, shifting constantly in response to the environment.

I am moving in this direction for the sake of efficiency – nature’s selection pressure. Or something like that. Recently, I have found that I am most likely to write on my phone at the farm. This is not ideal but more important is that it is real – it actually happens sometimes and more than writing in a journal.

The goats have influenced this change.

Events like this – What are you doing!? – being screamed by and at each of us – and the purchase of a tractor led to the pasturing of the goats and the repair of the fence.

Time is another key factor.

This change has allowed me to spend more time at the farm, herding the goats. Because I have learned to be instinctively efficient (or busy), I began writing on my phone. I didn’t even have to write. I could just speak. Provided I was not using a bluetooth (as I often am), I later discovered.

The quality of the translations are so very bad when I am connected, that I began dictating them (and also typing) into Apple Pages. I will regularly post them here. Its like those long form interviews, except it is written rather than spoken extemporaneously. I would be willing to pay, Black Mirror style, to not have to listen to those. Though I am happy to read their thoughts on Twitter, I would prefer something between twitter posts and academic essays. An electronic journal of the Exit Strategy (a book that I have apparently stopped writing).

Perhaps I should post those here daily to secretly coerce me into finishing the book.

May 16, Friday

First of four day summer schedule. Next week “work from home” bc the AC for most buildings will be out. This is South Georgia, mind you, and the temp will reach 93 today.

Half intentionally I just opened another chapter in my life journal. And gave the previous two months of journaling a name – Spring 25. Then the name of this chapter epiphenominally revealed itself.

I have decided the deer that pass through here aren’t especially fond of young corn and tomatoes. That actionable intel leading to a data driven decision improving the efficiency of my operations with no cost beyond measurement and assessment.

It feels nice in the shade of the persimmon trees looking out over a depression, 60×40’ish, triangle shaped. It has a tall asian invasive grass that americans love to hate. Rather than try to turn it under with the tractor, I will set it aside as a shared permaculture space for me and the goats – just purchased lambs quarter seeds for this spot. More for the goats than for me, in the short run. And that’s ok, because I plan to eat the goats. Sounds kind of evil doesn’t it? Keeping goats for the sake of killing them and eating them. Christianity has taught us to feel this as evil. But all things die, and I must eat. What makes the goats better than the grass they will eat or the plants that I grow and eat? We all participate in our own oppression. Sometimes the source of our oppression improves our lives. We accept it because we deem it better than the alternatives.

But sometimes we don’t.

Saturday May 17

The crookneck squash is doing well. I have picked six in the last two days from three plants. I have one more in this bunch that has not produced fruit yet, but I believe it will.

I took two cuttings from a marijuana plant this morning. It is not producing fruit yet although the two males are done, and two other females have ceased making large leaves and are just producing bud. Its pretty cool to watch.

I also planted five trays of tobacco seeds – 100 each. Two Virginia, a Connecticut, a Turkish, and the Aztec Rustica.

Made some sun tea with the lemon bergamot growing in the herb garden. Its about the only thing that survived the hegelculture, drought, and goats.

Sunday May 18

Day 3 of the new chapter.

Today’s harvest is four radishes, all taken from the very bottom near the creek. I am surprised and disappointed by how poorly everything did down here. Perhaps the deer ate much of it. All I see growing out of those four plots – about about 7000 square feet I guess – were those four radishes, one and a third zucchini, and some very poor looking rice. The two largest radishes were already getting woody, so I composted them.

I watered again today – one trip / 10 gallons. Okra, onion, pigeon pea, and trees. I was delighted to find my two pecan trees today – the first ones I planted, actually. They have been hiding from the goats and the deer in one of two grass prairie microecos I created.

Actually, I think I found one yesterday. The larger one today. My guess is the leaves came out after the last rain.

My campfire – the sandstone rocks that make the ring – is filling in. I have taken to picking up rocks when walking the field with a spare hand. I haven’t cooked on it in a few trips – mostly because its hot, probably.

This morning I mowed some of the land on the east / goat side, including the depression near the old deer bower. The goats followed my lead and spent some time there today.

Monday, May 19

Day 4 of the new chapter takes us back to the old chapter a bit. I am technically still working today and through the end of the month, but the AC is out this week, so most of us are working from home. I had a meeting online this morning, checked and responded to emails a couple of times. When I got caught up, I went to the farm and stayed there about 2.5 hours. Goats to pasture for about an hour. Planted some things Kat brought down: olive tree, sweet potatoes, Irish potatoes; and I watered the tomatoes, squash, and the stuff inside the deer pen. Mended fence for probably 30 minutes – mostly because I noticed when I drove in that I left my tools out there yesterday. That was about all I did. I meant to pick the rutabagas but forgot.

After lunch, I will work on course development and will make a plan for the rest of summer. The rest of the week will be similar. Next week I will be on campus and will use some of that time to move offices and hopefully to workout.

Tuesday May 20

Stayed up late by my standards – 1130 – drinking and playing the guitar. A little sluggish this morning. Ran 5k. Walked some but was pleased with my stamina. Planted the lambs quarter this morning – sowed the depression. Doing so I discovered that the tangled mat of dead long stemmed grass that covers much of this area protects moisture in the ground beneath. Exposed areas are like flour. So I moved the grass aside with my boot, sowed a handful of seeds, and then covered it back up. I will be happy with a 20% germination rate and 1% seed rate. The goal is for it to be one of several self seeding plants that constitute a low-input, productive, micro-wetland – or swale.

The blood butcher corn I planted in this completely dry soil has germinated. I wondered if it would. The rate appears to be pretty good, so I am watering it today. I watered it lightly once before, but I did not know if it would do it any good, because the soil was like flour. Because of the leaf structure, many of the baby corn plants have a beautiful sphere of water – like a crystal ball – captured at the base of the leaves, where they emerge from the stalk.

I keep having to shoot the goats out of the plots. I don’t know if they are too dumb to understand or they just don’t care that I don’t want them there. I can get a shot decent enough to make the alpha jump from up to about 40 yards. It appears that they would much rather eat the crabgrass than the butter beans or corn. I have seen a couple of examples where they bit into the butterbeans accidentally and then just dropped it rather than eat it. I tasted the leaves and found them to be bitter. So, having so much crab grass in this plot seems to be an unexpected positive. Maybe.

I should water the tobacco every day rather than every other.

Wednesday May 21

I watered the tobacco plants yesterday. This morning the sand is concrete. Not sure what to do. Instinct is to but them in shade, but that opens up predation. I guess I need to get some clear plastic wrap to help hold the moisture in while allowing sun. Maybe a full sized greenhouse next spring.

It is another amazing overcast and windy morning. The recent lack of rain is disappointing but the weather can hardly have been better for this time of year.

Nature instinctively creates difference within and among populations.

Currently, I am standing in the shed. Its raining pretty hard. I was out plowing in it, but I have plowed all I want to have plowed, for now. There’s a lot of stuff I would like to transplant. Vegetable plots are full of weeds. I would like to consolidate the plants into a smaller area and till under the weeks and plant new seeds. That is a lot of work, though, and I believe it is likely not worth the calorie and time input. Before turning a new plot, I want to reset the pin on the tiller. I believe it would be sturdier if it were inserted from the opposite direction.

Next year I will try to plant in a way that allows me to use the tractor to weed. I am always learning. That sounds retarded because it is to trite. But I am learning a lot about a newish thing.

This morning when stretching in the living room and talking to Kat about her work drama, I heard a tree frog (rain frog) singing and thought out loud “he thinks it is going to rain today.” Then I checked the forecast and it had changed from no chance to ten percent chance. Now I believe I should pay more attention to the rain frogs when they chirp in the morning (they always chirp at dusk at the pond).

The rain moved out quickly. It went from dark skies to heavy rain to partly cloudy in a span of about 5 minutes. I transplanted 6 asparagus I found growing in the Mexican large flower clover that has taken over the first plot of land I plowed with my tractor. I now have ten asparagus in the deer pen. I also planted some zucchini (July 15), okra (July 30), halona f1 cantaloupe (Aug 10), sugar baby watermelon (Aug 15), NGA candy roaster (Sept 8), delicata squash (Sept 8), and Spaghetti Squash (Aug 25).

Thursday May 21

Short day. Going to have lunch with colleagues in town and then Kat and I have a date. Let goats out and planted four rows of okra beside the watermelons. About to plow a bit and head out.

Friday / Saturday May 23

In the shower before going to bed I realized (10) I realized I haven’t written much for the last couple of days. Today I mostly watered. Also let goats out twice and weeded and watered about half the plants in the butterbean plot. When I left home this morning the plan was to water the seeds planted the last two days, but the soil was such I couldn’t tell where they were exactly, and with water being such a valuable, labor intensive commodity, it did not seem rational to guess. Especially since there is a 30-60% chance six days next week. Instead I watered the youngest sprouts and those fruiting. The chestnuts look terrible.

I planted a lot of butterbeans (because they are not as susceptible to the weevil) in a variety of plots. They are doing well with minimum effort, limited water, and strong competition from weeds. We will see how it goes, but they look like a good choice and a potential long term staple.

Yesterday I finished planting all the seeds except for the tomatillo. Too dry for those tiny seeds (maybe too dry for the others as well).

Monday, Memorial Day

It is very humid this morning. Feels familiar. But I enjoy the occasional breeze and the moments the sun is blocked out by a cloud. This morning I am just cutting grass. Inside the deer pen and down the driveway / lawn area. I cut some along the tree lines out in the field – overrun by dog fennel – but decided there must be a better way. I plan to head home early today and work some in the yard. The goats now tend to go the the butter bean patch immediately. Then I shoot one of them with the bb gun when I catch up. Then they stay out of it until they are about ready to come back in – which is now. I am heading that way.

I saw the first butter bean pods on the plants inside the deer fence today.

Yesterday I took a demon gummy – and the experience was as psychedelic as I have had in a long time.

Tuesday May 27

I went to work today and did not make it out to the farm until this afternoon. It feels kind of weird after spending so much time here the last few days. The goats are eating vigorously. The big goat went immediately to the BB patch where the butterbeans are grown and goats are shot with a bb gun. But today I stood there a bit and he walked away. I watched the middle gen alpha female go in there for a bit. I did not shoot her but just paid attention to what she ate. After about 5 minutes of eating the crabgrass she walked near a butterbean but just passed it by, continuing to eat the soft broad leaves of grass.

Thursday May 29

The last day I work as Assistant Vice President for Academic Affairs, Director of Faculty Development, and Overlord of student engagement at ABAC. I wore shorts to work for the second time ever. The first time was yesterday.

I had a couple of meetings but spent most of the day moving out of my two offices and into one that is half the size of either. That’s quite alright. It is a cozy space. I am not especially claustrophobic. And since I am teaching three online classes in the fall and only one face to face – and I am no longer administrating, I don’t need a large office.

Today was the shortest time spent at the farm in a while. But I knew this week would be different.

I was at the farm for about 15 minutes. Then the rain came and the goats ran back into the pen. It is cool that they do that. I saw no reason to remain in the rain, so I came home, cooked a steak, played Civ, smoked weed, played guitar, and finished a bottle of yellowtail shiraz. In other words, a pretty standard evening.

Sometime soon I would like to make a summer calendar. What would I like to accomplish?

1. Finish cutting up all the trees that fell in the hurricane in October. The goal is to be done with that by the end of summer.
2. Related – mulch all of the branches – end of summer.
3. Build the new tractor shed – end of summer.
4. Clear brush where shed will go and mulch. End of first week in June.
5. I want most of what I eat this summer to be picked, caught, killed, or purchased/bartered from white oak or somewhere similar. Ongoing.
6. Related, I want to kill and eat two goats this summer – and to buy and trade a couple of goats. By the end of the first week in June, have a plan made for this.
7. Lift weights twice per week and regain muscle. Ongoing.
8. Run or cycle 3 times per week. Ongoing.
9. Be fully prepared for classes before they begin August 18.
10. Recreate beautiful yard.
11. Write.

Friday May 30

I am thankful for the 1/10 inch of rain we got yesterday, according to my gauge. It will keep the plants alive a few days and give me time to water. There is no forecast for rain for the next week so I will continue my approach of pulling a couple of barrows of eater each day and cycling through the plants by the end of that week or so.

This morning I will plant the zucchini that I started in trays. In addition, I hoed the oldest of the latest round of corns and beans and such. And I cut down a lot of fennel. It is getting tall again and the goats are interested in other things, so it continues to grow. I would like to replace it with something that better suits my needs. While doing this, I listened to B. Russel’s history of philosophy, chps 2-4.

I want to infuse the experience of the next couple of months with something meaningful. Ideally, this thing would imbue everything with meaning in a positively spiritual way. I have no desire to denigrate the world, and I do not want to see the farm tasks as purely instrumental. As work. It is really about my state of mind. I have been in it before. Marijuana draws my attention to this path and guides my spirit in this direction.

Before coming out here I experienced a dizzy spell that continued here. I am glad I did not decide to skip out on the farm but came and accomplished things. There is certainly more I could do, but I am ready to go home and write.

Saturday, May 31

I am not anti-government so much as I am anti-bad-government. The same is true for college leadership. Regarding both I believe I have a fair and rational judgment of the goodness of government. I am less antigovernment now than I have been at times in the past. This is partly because I am changing worlds and no longer care about the government and have lost all hope in it. These days it is less likely to disappoint me because my expectations are so very low.

I am increasingly attentive to things at the farm. I want to integrate my consciousness into this land. This will require loosening my integration into the social and political world.

Final Thoughts

So, in conclusion, the last two weeks at the farm have been a transitional time for me. A liminal shift from administrator to subsistence farmer. I did not quit my job completely, but I decided to buy back my summers and free up some space in my mind. I am a bit behind schedule. Most of the stuff I planted early did not make it to maturity – like less than 5% probably. And the other stuff was planted late. Much of that had to do with time and stress.

I hope that next year I will be more on schedule and will have much more to harvest during this time. I definitely see this as a learning year – a transitional time – and I am learning much. One thing I will have to pay attention to is the end of spring semester, when things get really busy. Hopefully I can design my online courses in ways that reduce the end of semester crunch. But that is not really a fault of this the last two weeks. I have taken a pretty substantial step toward self sufficiency – a sufficiency that is necessarily place and time dependent and never full, in part because there is no self that is static and unchanging. Self sufficiency is always a relative term.